Smile.......Please!

I asked a child to pick out a book for me to read to the kindergarten group today and maybe next time I will pick the book. Not that I can get mad, as there is nothing to be mad at, but of all books to pick she picks........a picture book. The most difficult part was suppressing uncontrollable laughter. So I made up a story to go with the pictures and read it in funny voices. Funny voices being defined as a Virginia accent, English accent and New England accent. At least I got to practice dialects although the story was primarily inspired by David Lynch and China Mieville.

Next time I pick the book.

Stormtroopers

Spent my afternoon dancing with a chicken suited stormtrooper. Dont ask. But I got a free comic book.


Wish I got a free taco instead.

Thoughts about the beard.

As I was admiring myself in the mirror this morning I noticed something. The beard is showing signs of snow. This can only mean one of two things. Either I am getting older or.................I am a wizard. As I am showing no signs of aging the latter must be correct. Now, this presents a whole new set of problems. One, I have no magic wand or staff so I have to wander into the woods this weekend and chop down some magic trees. Then comes shaping the wood, which I have no talent for, and dipping the damn thing in fairy dust. As luck would have it I just ran out last week. Two, I have no pointy hats to wear around town and have to hire a wizened defunct cobbler or some shit to make me a hat. The life of a wizard is hard and busy. If I am out of touch for a while it's due to wizard training. Wish me luck.

Quote of the day part two........

Me: "Child, you have your shirt on backward and inside out."
Child: "Thats why my buttons were weird this morning."

Once again, how are these creatures not all doing stand-up. Maybe their is hope for humankind after all.

Quote of the day

Nobody can run faster than a person with a jetpack!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5 year olds are hilarious. Plus, how can you argue with that logic. The fact that this was screamed by a 5 year old at another 5 year old made it all that more entertaining.